Friday, September 11, 2009
Being a proactive person I sometimes let my environment dictate the way I think, feel and behave; however, I know that I have to change this way of thinking. I have to gain awareness to the things that I CAN help and those that I must leave behind. I have a vision of what I want to be and where I want to be but I have a hard time actually getting there. I am not sure what my roadblock is but maybe if I could define that, I would have an easier time. I do not think that I take time to nurture the relationships that I have. I just kind of take things for granted. I try to have integrity by sticking to my true feelings, values and commitments. Sometimes it is not as easy as just saying that. Very often I find myself saying, "I'm not trying to hurt you but I can not find another way to say this..." Its not that I want to hurt someone. I just want the person to know that I'm not being mean. I don't know how to correctly phrase what I want to say. I attempt to be mature and not hurt any person's feelings. I am so guilty of not actually listening to people. I totally do what the fifth step says-all the time. Perhaps I should step back and take the time to listen and really hear what someone is saying to me. I love being different. That is what makes me, me. I enjoy not being like everyone else. If we were all the same it would be a very boring and lonely place. I do burn both ends of the candle all the time, but I need to take time out for me and relax a bit more. These are some of the things that I would like to do.